The Smarties over at the Oregon Health Authority are determined to sour parents on Halloween.
The OHA released a short video, “Healthier Things,” showing an adorable girl dressed in a pirate costume ringing a doorbell and holding out a pumpkin bag for a treat. The OHA plays a trick on her, instead. She gets a cup of sugar dumped in her bag, followed by corn syrup, food coloring and hydrogenated oil. “What are you handing out this Halloween?” appears on the screen.
It’s tough to watch this video and not dissolve into Snickers.
Are the people at the OHA such Crybabies that kids can’t be allowed a day to dress up and collect candy without the state of Oregon waving an angry Pixy Stix at them? The idea for this video must have been hatched in a Sour Patch.
We asked the OHA how much it paid for the video. At least there was no big PayDay. The only cost was six hours of shooting time and post-production by the OHA videographer. The rest was donated.
The OHA says the video was done as part of its lofty efforts Now and Later to promote oral health and prevent obesity. But the video doesn’t offer any useful advice other than try to set off a Fireball in the brains of parents. “Kids these days get a ton of candy at Halloween. Rather than hide it from them — or worse, eat it yourself! — what can a concerned parent do?” the OHA says. Are we to get ready for an OHA Christmas episode pining for candy canes made of artfully twisted radishes and okra and an Easter episode with broccoli bunnies?
It’s no Whopper that kids don’t need to gorge themselves on candy. It’s also no good for the state to aim a Bazooka at kids having a day when candy is not an agent of evil.